And…..I hit publish before I was even close to finished…..
My apologies to the twenty people who follow me. Well….except for the bots and spammers….they can bite me.
On a personal note, I’ve been struggling with depression. Those who have struggled with it know that it can leave you drained and uninspired. I haven’t really felt like writing. Or bathing. Or waking up.
I’ve had two requests….one was to write about the history of the Karen meme. The other was to write about why there are so many women who are attracted to abusive men. Neither of those topics felt inspiring until I realized….there is a running theme here, the destructive elements of femininity.
Today’s topic will be the Karen, my next post will be about women who are attracted to abusive men. So let’s begin.
Oh, and um….Karen at work…..? Yeah, you are nothing like this. I’m proud to work with you, and frankly they should be using my ex wife’s name….but you can’t always get what you want…..
Here I will list some websites I used to research this topic:
The “Karen” is the entitled white woman (or whitish….I think there have been other races involved in the trope, but this isn’t rocket science so let’s continue) who complains for petty reasons to managers, police, or other authority figures and use their privilege to get their way. Some are more successful than others.
My ex wife was the ultimate Karen. Anything in the world that was not exactly to her liking was a Federal case, and her ability to just let something go was virtually nonexistent. I used to tip wait staff very well in the hopes that it made up a little bit for her constant complaints and having to have everything just the way she wanted it. She refused to order off the menu, she always had to put her own touch on things. God forbid that we should simply eat in peace after I had worked my eighteen hours that day….no….everyone around her had to be made to suffer, and to understand that she was the poor victim, so abused by a world that didn’t put enough alfredo sauce on the ravioli. “And God said let there be grief, and there was my ex, the narcissist. And God looked upon this and saw it was very grievous. And the Devil was with her well pleased.” God spare me the bane of perfectionism.
The topic is controversial because many white women feel like this is just another tool of the patriarchy to silence them. And that may be so…..having said that……
Part of the archetype goes back all the way back to the horrific days of slavery in the old South. Anyone who has read Uncle Tom’s Cabin remembers that the second most evil person in the book is Mrs. Shelby, who literally sells Uncle Tom down the river when her husband Mr. Shelby, who had promised Uncle Tom his freedom but never drew up the papers, died. I know a lot can be said about the patriarchy oppressing the women at the time, but many slaves were more terrified of Miss Anne than her father or husband the so called master of the household.
My last point is….these often aren’t women who are protesting horrible things. If they were yelling about rapes or about a woman’s struggle to raise a child alone in this society, then I’d say there is a point to those who say that the term “Karen” is sexist. But most of these women are themselves oppressing people who they see as beneath them. Like the woman at the Wal Mart who was mad at me for being on the aisle filling my product. “You shouldn’t be in the way. You are only a worker.”
And that is why we hate them. These women are insulting folks who are often just trying to get through a hard day. Or just trying to enjoy the birds, or park in the first parking spot they find. Karen’s will stop at nothing to destroy you if you are in their way. A black man is in the woods and you don’t want him there? Call the police and say he is attacking you. A barista of Hispanic descent wants you to wear a mask? “I want to talk to your manager.” Ok…..fine….technically these a are men and therefor in some sense part of the patriarchy, and I get as a wannabe revolutionary we want to “confound Jerry at every turn.” But if these women were people of character, if they were actually brave and not just bullies, they would go after Bill Gates or Vladimir Putin, or at least the white president of the Home Owner’s Association. No….let’s be gutless cowards and go after lower class workers who are living paycheck to paycheck and make sure their suffering increases a hundred fold. Jesus said what you have done to the least of these, you have done unto Him. So think about it Karen’s of the world….what have you been doing to “the least of these”?
This article in The Atlantic does a wonderful job of telling the two sides of the story, how a fair number of white women feel the label of “Karen” is yet another tool of the patriarchy to keep her down.
But the article also explains perfectly why so many of all sexes and races hate the “Karen:”
“The target of Karen’s entitled anger is typically presumed to be a racial minority or a working-class person, and so she is executing a covert maneuver: using her white femininity to present herself as a victim, when she is really the aggressor.”
Karen’s of the world…..I applaud you! Your passive aggressive tactics are stellar. You get the best of both worlds….both a baby and a bully, is it any wonder that the “Karen” and the “Miss Anne,” whatever sex, whatever gender, are despised? I think you have taken the idea of passive aggression to the most excellent end you could, and when after a lifetime of tyrannizing the rest of us, whether we be black or white, Hispanic or Asian, straight or gay, male, female, or something altogether unknown to me, we will all applaud when, in the Judgement Seat of Heaven, our Lord says to you “I never knew you, depart from me, ye workers of Karen-ness!”